How do I give negative feedback?

Welcome to “Pressing Questions,” Fast Company’s mini advice column. Twice a week, Deputy Editor Kathleen Davis, host of The New Way We Work podcast will answer the biggest and most pressing workplace questions in less than one minute.

Q: How do I give negative feedback?

A: File this one under necessary but uncomfortable workplace conversations. It doesn’t matter if you are a new manager or have been a boss for decades, giving negative feedback feels icky. But something a guest on the New Way We Work told me a few years ago has stuck with me: Feedback is a gift. Reframing it that way has made it easier for me to both receive and give feedback. After all, if someone doesn’t care about you they wouldn’t bother to give you feedback.

So that’s the first step—being open to receiving and asking for feedback yourself. That way it feels like a gift rather than a punishment. 

Next, start with a question rather than a statement. Asking about the situation in question allows the other person to share important facts that you may not know about.

Once you hear things from their perspective, share your observations, not conclusions. Feedback is a dialogue. You do not have a monopoly on the truth, you have your perspective, so make sure to state it as such.

Finally, end the conversation by focusing on improving the future. “What can be done to prevent this situation from happening in the future? What are the concrete steps for improvement? How will you measure success?  No matter how the conversation unfolds, the key is to come to an agreement about what can be done differently.

Want to take more notes before you schedule your feedback meeting? Here’s some more reading:

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