As former President Donald Trump pivots his focus to his new opponent, Vice President Kamala Harris, he continues to intentionally mispronounce and make fun of her name. In his first rally since she announced her bid for the presidency, Trump referenced Vice President Harris’s name dozens of times. And every single time, he mispronounced “Kamala.”
Vice President Harris’s first name is part of her Indian heritage. It means “lotus flower,” and is pronounced “Comma-la.” Trump continues to pronounce her name, “Kah-MAH-la.” In a speech, Trump said he “couldn’t care less” if he mispronounces Harris’s name. In the past, Trump has accused Vice President Harris of not being able to pronounce her own name correctly. And apparently, he has a track record of mispronouncing the names of individuals who aren’t white, both Democrats and Republicans.
Harris’s name being mispronounced over and over again on the national stage is a disrespect that so many of us privately endure in our workplaces. For much of my career, I have been plagued with having my name mispronounced and misspelled. I have also been nicknamed at work without my permission.
I have compassion and understanding for colleagues trying to pronounce my name correctly, particularly the first time we meet. And unfortunately, like Vice President Harris, I have been mocked, made fun of, and questioned about my name. Over the years, I have heard comments like, “How do you pronounce your name? Mai-Tai? Like the yummy drink? I want me some Mai-Tai!” Or, “Why do you mispronounce your own name? It should be pronounced Mee-tha, not Me-ta. No wonder why people can’t get your name right.”
A coworker once even said to me, “Your parents should have given you an American version of your name, like Mary or something.”
And despite my track record of success and many accolades and achievements, the targeting of my name has made me feel unwelcome and unworthy—and at times, that I just don’t belong on that team. Unfortunately, I believe this may be the explicit goal of those who intentionally mispronounce the names of others.
Pronouncing names correctly is one of the first and most basic ways people feel welcomed into our organizations. Here are three things to focus on when it comes to pronouncing names correctly:
Start by remembering the importance of names
There have been many moments in my career when I have observed colleagues say the following when dealing with “difficult names”:
- “Do you have a nickname? Can I call you something else?”
- “How about we shorten it together?”
- “Yikes, I am going to get this wrong.”
- “Oh god! Is it just me or is this really hard to pronounce?”
- “Ah, I said it wrong again. My bad. I know, I won’t make it a bigger deal than it is.”
If you have a name that is considered common where you live, and easy to pronounce by many in the United States, you likely never have had to worry about your name being mispronounced. Some might say you have the privilege of having a name that everyone easily recognizes and understands. As a result you might wonder, “What’s the big deal about getting names right? Why are people so overly sensitive?”
My name is part of who I am. My name was given to me by my parents, who had big hopes and dreams for me. When colleagues pronounce my name correctly, I feel seen and respected on my team and in my organization. In fact, research shows that when we hear the sound of our names, we get excited. Our brains light up with joy.
And according to the U.K. organization Race Equality Matters, 73% of people have had their name mispronounced. Of those who have had their name mispronounced, 43% said it made them feel disrespected, 30% found it upsetting, and 21% said “it made them feel like they didn’t belong.”
Employees who feel like they don’t belong can find this impacting their overall well-being and are more likely to quit. Treating individuals with respect and care starts with getting their names right.
Don’t question how someone pronounces their name, just learn to pronounce it correctly
Over the years, I have been questioned on how I choose to pronounce my first name. Some have told me that how I pronounce my name is not the correct pronunciation. So they argue that I shouldn’t care how people say my name in the first place, when I apparently mispronounce my own name.
If we want to honor names, we don’t question how the person asks us to pronounce their own name. We respect and abide by how they would like us to say their name. We listen with care. We take the time to practice it. We ask for help from others when we just can’t seem to get it right, and we ask to be held accountable for pronouncing names correctly.
Several years ago, I had a really hard time pronouncing a colleague’s name correctly. We worked closely together. I just didn’t understand why the pronunciation didn’t come easily. And I didn’t stop practicing until I got it right. I wrote it out phonetically, listened to her pronouncing it on her LinkedIn profile, and had a Post-it reminder in my notebook on how to pronounce it. I finally was able to pronounce her name correctly and got other colleagues to do the same. I remember her eyes welling up with tears, as she said that in the past, other team members had ended up giving her a nickname, and that it meant more than she could express that we cared enough to learn to say her name.
Intervene when you see someone’s name purposely being mispronounced
When someone’s name is being purposely mispronounced in our workplaces, it’s a microaggression. When it happens repeatedly, it can become workplace bullying, which then can potentially evolve into harassment. As someone who has had her name mispronounced and has been nicknamed at work, I get exhausted by constantly speaking up and advocating for myself. Some days, it’s just easier to sit through a meeting or an interaction with someone mispronouncing my name than to find the energy to correct them over and over again.
And this is where allies come in. When we see (or hear) something, we must say something.
Here are some ways to intervene in the moment, or to pull them aside afterward and talk one-on-one to the person causing the harm:
- “You do realize you keep mispronouncing Mita’s name, don’t you? Why is that?”
- “That’s not how Mita pronounces her name. I am happy to help you learn how to pronounce it correctly.”
- “I noticed you laughed while mispronouncing her name. How would you feel if someone mispronounced your name and didn’t make the effort to learn how to say your name?”
If you observe it happening repeatedly, check in with the person being impacted. If the offending individual doesn’t want to apologize, does not have any interest in learning to pronounce their colleague’s name correctly, it may be time to enlist the help of Human Resources. Because their repetitive, harmful behavior should have consequences.
Let’s remember that Vice President Kamala Harris’s parents had big hopes and dreams for her. Her name is part of who she is. Now she’s on her way to potentially becoming the next President of the United States. Whether you agree with her policies or track record, she at least deserves the basic respect we all do. Learn to pronounce her name correctly.
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