When to Travel With a Romantic Partner For the First Time

Traveling with a romantic partner is like a major compatibility test: it can be a dream or it can end your relationship quicker than you can re-download that dating app. Whether you’re flying, driving, or traveling by train, nothing will test your relationship more than dealing with unexpected delays, lost luggage, and a shared small bathroom.

But while it’s important to know how to travel with your partner, it’s equally important to know when to travel with your partner for the first time. In other words, how early is too early to travel together?

On one hand, it’s not a bad idea to see all of your partner’s travel red flags at the very beginning of dating. (Are you really going to introduce your parents to someone who refused to let you have the window seat?) On the other hand, you don’t necessarily want to travel with someone you don’t feel comfortable pooping in front of.

So when exactly is the right time to take that first trip together? Relationship expert Nicole Moore explains below.

Experts Featured in This Article

Nicole Moore is a relationship therapist and founder of the Love Works Method, a program that has helped people find lasting love fast.

When to Travel With a Partner For the First Time

Knowing when to travel with a partner for the first time is less about the amount of time you have been together and more about how you feel when you’re with them. “You should wait to travel with someone until you feel a sense of safety with them, you feel comfortable around them, and you trust that you’ll have lots to talk about when spending an extended period of time with them,” Moore says.

Basically, if you haven’t told your friends or family about them, don’t know their last name, or are unsure about where your relationship stands, it’s probably not a good idea to travel just yet. “It can be a safety risk to travel with someone you don’t really know well yet,” Moore says. Plus, if someone is trying to take you away on a trip at the very beginning of your relationship, it could be a sign of love bombing.

Additionally, if you haven’t had sex with this person yet, traveling together can put some added pressure on vacation sex. “If you’re someone who has anticipatory stress about being intimate with a partner for the first time or you get into your head about sex, you might want to wait on taking a trip with your partner until after you’ve already been intimate,” Moore adds.

That said, you don’t want to wait too long to travel with a partner for the first time, Moore says. “Travel is a litmus test for true compatibility in a relationship, and if you wait too long to travel with a partner, you might wish you’d done it sooner and realized they’re not right for you earlier on,” she cautions.

For this reason, she suggests traveling with a partner when you feel good about your relationship and trust the person you’re with. It doesn’t have to be some lavish vacation, but a small weekend getaway or road trip is an easy way to find out who your partner is when they’re outside their normal routine.

What Should Your First Couples Trip Look Like?

For your first-ever couples trip, Moore suggests a two-night stay somewhere close enough for a short flight or short car ride. “If you keep the trip under two nights, it’s a short enough period of time that, if you realize you’re incompatible, you won’t feel like you’ve wasted too much time, but it’s long enough that if the connection is going well, it will give you a chance to get even closer,” she adds.

A day trip is another great idea. “You’ll get a small taste of what traveling with your partner is like without having to worry about an overnight stay if you’re not yet comfortable sharing a new space with them,” Moore says.

At the end of the day, it really comes down to your comfort level with someone. As long as you feel safe and comfortable, it’s not a bad idea to travel with someone early on in your relationship. But don’t feel like you have to put any pressure on it either.

The time will come soon enough where you’ll be able to explore the many joys of vacation sex. Until then, find out whether your partner is team aisle seat or team window seat — it’s more important than you think.

Taylor Andrews (she/her) is the balance editor at PS, specializing in topics relating to sex, relationships, dating, sexual health, mental health, travel, and more. With seven years of editorial experience, Taylor has a strong background in content creation and storytelling. Prior to joining PS in 2021, she worked at Cosmopolitan.