DEAR ABBY: My brother recently called to tell me he had proposed to his girlfriend, and she happily accepted. While I’m glad he is happy, I’m worried about what to do if he asks me to be his best man.
While his girlfriend can be a nice person, they have a one-sided relationship in which she controls a lot of what my brother does. She always needs to be the center of attention at family functions and piles on the PDA toward my brother in public places.
I feel bad for him because he hasn’t been in many romantic relationships and, to me, it just seems like he’s settling. I may be jumping the gun on this — maybe he won’t ask — but I really believe that the best man at their wedding should be someone who truly supports this relationship — and that isn’t me. Any advice? — “WORST MAN” IN NEW YORK
DEAR “WORST MAN”: Bide your time. Because your brother’s fiancee is the one in control, SHE may be the one who decides who should be the best man. If she has a brother or a male cousin she feels close to, you may be off the hook. However, if you are asked, you will have to fess up and tell him about your concerns as diplomatically as possible.
***
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.