DEAR ERIC: My family lives in a small apartment building and we really enjoy our neighbors. However, there is one issue that rears its head around holidays that I’m unsure of how to address without potentially offending these good neighbors.
Our family doesn’t travel very frequently. We also don’t receive a lot of packages compared to many of our neighbors, most of whom get multiple packages a day. I’m often asked if I can collect packages while other families who travel frequently are gone.
If it were only ever so often or only a package here and there, I wouldn’t mind. However, it seems I have become the go-to person and there are many, many packages to look out for. Furthermore, several times once I have collected and held packages for neighbors, they do not come and pick them up in a timely manner once they’ve returned. Thus, we have been left with stacks of boxes and envelopes, and I’ve had to request that people come get their belongings.
Even if we aren’t traveling, I find it burdensome to have to be on the lookout for packages, so they don’t go missing once they are left by the carrier, store the packages and then remind people to remove them from our space.
If a neighbor asks if we’ll be around for a holiday, I don’t want to lie and say we won’t be. However, I’m tired of being asked to be a default porter. Can you suggest how I might handle this dilemma with minimal damage to my good relationships with likeable neighbors?
– Package Deal
DEAR DEAL: Just because you’re around doesn’t mean you’re waiting by the mailbox. You’ve got your own life. If your neighbors are likable (and popular enough to receive barrages of gifts during the holidays), then I hope they’re also even-keeled enough to just hear the truth. Talking to your neighbors on a case-by-case basis will work best.
“We’ve gotten overwhelmed by packages for the building and we have a busy schedule this holiday. So, to make sure we don’t miss something important, can you set a delivery hold with the Post Office?” Other delivery services, like UPS, DHL and the like, also make it very easy to set alternate delivery locations or dates. If they take offense to the completely reasonable request that they go to a website and click one button, that’s on them.
(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.)
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