“You can’t rely on willpower alone because it comes in waves. It’s up and down and not dependable,” Cleo says.
“Setting big goals and hoping for the best is futile – we need small wins that reinforce our self efficacy and commitment to change. Micro-habits set you up for easy wins. If you give yourself a small goal, like reducing screen time by five minutes and you achieve that goal, your brain triggers a reward pathway that helps you experience pleasure and satisfaction. ”
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An example of how this can work is a man whose micro-habit of walking around the house led to a 10-kilometre run.
“His goal was to walk five kilometres around the park, but I asked him to start with just putting on his walking shoes. He graduated to putting them on every day and walking around the house, then walking to the end of the street until eventually he was walking five kilometres. He lost weight, increased his confidence – and went on to run a 10 kilometre race.”
The key is to make a habit small enough for you to do it consistently, stresses Cleo.
“We create new neurons and synaptic connections through a new skill or experience, and we strengthen neural connections through repetition which leads to long term change. ”
Dr Gina Cleo’s tips for success
- It’s more productive to move slowly
- Forget the “go hard or go home” mentality. It doesn’t work long term.
- Creating small consistent changes adds up to lifestyle change more than trying to create big changes.
- Focus on rituals, not results.
- The more you’re aware of your habit triggers, the quicker you can break an unwanted habit.
- Cultivate self-efficacy. It means having a ‘can do’ attitude and taking action when met with a challenge. Replace thoughts of self-doubt with beliefs that you can be – and are -the person you need to be to achieve your goals.
Getting back on track
One of Cleo’s book’s strengths is that it goes beyond strategies for behaviour change to dealing with the factors that can deplete self-control, like stress and lack of sleep, and informs you how to bounce back if you slip off course.
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“A lapse shouldn’t be seen as failure but a way to gain insight, reflecting on why the lapse happened and how you could avoid or counteract it on your next attempt. Research repeatedly shows this mindset is crucial for changing ingrained habits.”
But don’t wait too long to try again, Cleo adds. “Pick yourself up as soon as possible. Today. Right now.”
Also, our mindset matters. Just as the impact of stress depends on the narrative you put around it, the way you see each setback is a choice: is it failure or a chance to learn how to succeed?”
After all, Cleo says, Thomas Edison made 1000 unsuccessful attempts to invent the lightbulb, and when a reporter asked him how it felt to fail 1000 times, Edison said, “I didn’t fail 1000 times – the lightbulb was an invention with 1000 steps”.
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